THE LORD'S LANTERN IN BUDAPEST
Petőfi the poet, was dancing in his underwear,
his wife was in panties, and the went to see a movie.
They sat on a bench, right on some dog shit.
They watched the film, while they pissed their pants.
Katika, what are you doing?
If I was an animal, I wouldn't keep a human as a pet.
- They're loud and dirty... - and unhygienic.
ROUND AND ROUND
They're over there.
Ok.
Soon we'll be digging their grave.
No, not that soon, they're here all the time.
We could dig there grave today.
When do we start?.
When do we start, Józsi.
- Ok. - Yes.
Peti do you have to comment on everything?
Are you humming, Gyula, my friend?
- Stop whistling. - But I wasn't whistling.
You were whistling and I told you not to whistle.
Fine, but I wasn't whistling.
- For fuck's sake, you were whistling and now you're lying too. - Why?
Because, you're a shitty, trashy, shithead. I pulled you out of the gutter, no?
I brought your here, you promised me the moon and stars, right?
Did I pull you out of the gutter, or didn't I?
- You did. - And now you're whistling, you ass?
Amongst the nation's greatest? Where our ancestor's fucking ghosts walk!
You're not going to disturb their peace!
For Fuck's sake, I won't take the heat for you!
- Hold on. - Understand? The whip cracks on my back for everything!
- Understand? - yes, absolutely, just stop choking me.
You know how sensitive I am, I get a boner if someone touches me here.
- End it! - Ok.
- I said end it. - What's that, should I shut up?
- Yes, put a sock in it! - Oh, ok.
I don't really understand, cause...
- 1... 2... 3... - Ok.
- 4... 5. - Do you have five too?
I've got five too.
- Greetings Mr. Hernádi. - Hello, you old so and so.
- At your service Mr. Director. - Hello, Peti.
Health and happiness. Mr. Hernádi.
- Were you whistling Mr. Hernádi? Were you? - I wasn't whistling. I wasn't.
- Say it already. - Were we taking a walk in the cemetery?
We weren't walking. Not walking. We came on our bikes.
- Say it. - And where are the bikes?
- No wait... how're you getting home without the bikes? - Leave it Peti, it's no good.
I messed it up, I said it wrong.
- It was fine. - He just fucked it up, Péter fucked it up.
It's supposed to be... it's a very old fucking anecdote.
- Greetings Juli. God bless. - Would you stop?
- Start from further back. - But I don't have any more lines.
- God bless, Juli. - You too, Péter, my son.
- Where are you riding to, Juli. - Just here to the cemetery.
And who's going to take the bike home? Well, how was it?
- I'm sorry, Mr. Jancsó. - She doesn't get it, see, she doesn't get the joke.
- She's not laughing. - I'm sorry.
- Don't throw this out. - Keep this one too, it's nice.
- It's still good. - Take it to the afternoon grave site...
- Do you have a marker? - Sure.
Then we'll write something on it, we can make at least 300 forint on it?
- Ask for 2000. - 2000, for each one?
See, I like this, this doesn't rot away, it stays in one piece.
- Look at these roses, see? - It's really pretty.
You could even use it for a fucking bridal bouquet.
You need to trim it a little.
Stop whistling Peti.
- But... - I said stop whistling.
I wasn't whistling, the killer was whistling, pay more attention.
- Are you messing with me? - No.
I told you, he was hiding here, he's been here for 3 days.
- Stop messing with me. - There, Tunze. Hey, Tunze.
Hey, come here, for a bit. Come on.
It's so good that you're here.
Hi.
So... he's my friend.
Who are you?
- Tell him, to tell me his name. - I think that was it,
- it's not the short version. - Ok, for simplicity's sake.
Tell him, Józsi, stop whistling 'cause I'm allergic to noise.
No... No... whistling. Whistling.
I told you no whistling. That's what I said, no whistling.
'Cause I'll kick you ass. Piss off right now.
- In a flash. - you won't disturb the ancestor's peace.
Flash, flash. Flash.
Right, I told you not to mess with me. You won't disturb the ancestor's peace.
- The gun has a silencer. - My foot has ass kicker boots.
Understand? Boots. Get the fuck out of here, before I kick your ass.
Go on, get! Don't turn around!
The Peking duck was whistling.
- Greetings. - Oh, hello Tibi, you look fucking elegant.
Thank you. It goes with the ambience of this place. Mr. Writer, Mr. Director, some champagne?
- Yes, but only if it's sweet. - Dry.
I'm a piece of old furniture. Pepe, for you?
- Aglass or a pint? - Aglass of beer and a whiskey.
- Whiskey? - Whiskey. Tibi, one...
- glass of beer. - Glass of beer.
- Two, hold on since when do you call me Pepe? - Just one glass of beer.
And a whiskey, 'cause Kapa isn't here, so by his authority and in his name.
- Bravo. - You look good. Just kidding.
Mr. Hernádi, the killers are at the next table.
- Would you like to meet them? - Excuse me, sorry.
I'm not the killer. I don't even have a gun, I'm the manager.
- What's that like? - Can't complain.
Though it's tiring sometimes. Travel, travel, travel.
- Perks? - No complaints, Salary plus premium, which can be 3 times my salary.
- That's great. - Sweet, dry and these are for you.
Thanks.
So... never with beer.
- Chin chin. - Chin chin.
- Tibi, I've got his as well. - Thank you.
Mr. Hernádi, much obliged, thank you very much.
Are we leaving?
- Zsolti. - Thank you.
Take care.
- Tibi, do you mind if I take the glass? - I'm sure you'll bring it back.
Hello.
Whose is this aspen orchard, you can't hear the noises from outside,
They're either sleeping, or they're not listening.
Or they don't even want to hear it.
This little girl, she heard it.
She told her mother, that she heard it.
Come out, my dear mother, come out.
My dear rose wants to say good-bye
Come out...
Accurate, always accurate.
Bulls eye.
Why the fuck did you have to take out those two poor old men?
- The list, they're on the list. - List, but why?
- Why? That question doesn't exist in this business. - Anyone can be wiped out?
- The list, I told you, the list. - And if I'm not on the list,
and I say shoot me. Would you do it?
For you, gladly. For free even.
- Ok. - You can go to hell.
You want to get shot? Zsolti, if I see even a drop of blood,
I'll make you lick it up. So much you'll shit your pants.
We're clean kitty-cat, clean.
Boss, greetings.
Shots rang out.
Zsolt.
You, your friend and his silencer, need to piss off, now.
- Before I lose my patience. - Don't do it.
Zsolti glasses.
Tibi come on.
Say, little Kapa.
Listen, don't be mad, Mr. Hernádi bit a piece out of the glass.
Fuck. It was Icelandic crystal.
- Well he liked that. - Me too.
Who's is the aspen orchard, you can't hear the noises from outside,
They're either sleeping, or they're not listening,
or they don't even want to hear it.
- This little girl she heard it... - Fuck, my bladder's about to burst.
- She told her mother she heard it... - you listening?
What?
- Wake up! Wake up! - Gotta take a leak.
- Well go. ...my dear mother.
- Here, you ass? - My dear rose...
- Here... if you need to so bad? - Wants to say good-bye.
- Wake up, wake up, my dear mother. - Whose urn have you got?
- My dear, rose... - I think it's Mr. Hernádi's, the writer.
- Wants to say good-bye. - You ass, I've got his.
Not possible, then they fucked you over. They gave it to me, I've got it here.
- Fine, don't get upset, let's switch them. - Don't get upset... don't get upset.
Let's switch them.
It stinks!
- Wait, you missed some. - They got a little mixed up.
That's not good. Fuck!
- Fuck. - The whole thing leaked out. My jacket's full of this shit, fuck.
- Will this come out? - Crap, it stinks.
It really does, you sure it's them?
- I don't know. - Did they cremate a skunk?
- Sssssh... - yuck, what a smell!
I swear, I'm about to puke.
Whoa.
I'm gonna fucking chuck.
Hey! I must be insane, that's Lajos Kossuth.
- What? What the fuck are you on about? - There, Lajos Kossuth, he's standing there.
- You are insane. - Stop messing about, I'm serious.
He's standing there, he's putting the papers down on the table.
- You ass, that's Galkó. - Galkó who? Stop messing about, that's Kossuth Lajos.
No that's Galkó. Listen, I bet the wind's gonna blow those papers away.
- Come on. - No, I bet you.
- There's no wind. - Come on, bet me.
- There's no wind. - Will you bet, or what?
- What are the stakes? - Two fucking big punches.
- No, two beers. - Fuck no, you'll never pay.
- Your a cheapskate, come on, let's bet. - Alright.
Shake on it.
So, daddy?
- They blew away. - I told you, you ass.
- I'd like to give you, your betting. - Give it to me.
Gently, gently, are you insane?
- Shut up. - You're rolling up your sleeves...
- Are you insane? - Turn this way, so I can hit you properly.
- Turn this way. - Hold up, if they see us, I don't know what I'll do.
They're going to suspend us.
There are no ashes in here.
- No! - It's empty!
The shitheads! Did they forget to put it in?
- Whatever, pretend it's in there. - But, it's not.
Whatever, he asked to be poured into the garbage, pretend.
Fly my horse. You're tomorrow's hero.
- Fuck, that was three portions. - How come?
- Too much ash for one dead body! - Then that's both of them?
- I told you, it's three. - Who's the third?
- Tips? - 2000.
After such a great writer?
Fuck them.
How do you know he's great, what did you read from him?
- They said. - They said.
- And you believe everything... what fucking great writer? - Why?
- Why? - You know what they were?
- Come on. - Jokers.
They ended up right where they belong.
2000 forint, is there no shame!
I'm going to taste it.
- Well? - Mmm.
If only they were this good in life.
- Give me some. - There.
Get the fuck out of here.
Hey, this kinda stinks.
Don't mess with me, Coolbreeze.
- Fine... - Let's have a beer.
Nyék, Megyer, Külgyarmat, Tarján, Jenő, Kér, Keszi.
Great Lajos, but can you say, Grosics, Puskás, Hidegkúti.
- Lantos, Zakariás, Cibor... - Budai.
Budai. You know them?
- Budai? - Let's drink.
Good appetite.
- Want some? - Not eating.
- Have you seen Józsi? - Yeah, he's down in the dumps.
- He's under the weather. - Józsi!
Stop yelling, I'm here.
- Stop yelling you ox? - Hello.
- Must be 'cause of a woman. - He doesn't have one.
Exactly, Peti.
- What about the widow in the bushes? - What?
- The widow in the bushes. - That's not what you said before.
- Then what. - You stuttered.
Are you fucking with me?
- So which woman? - The one you fucked too, you know.
- Stop messing around. - Why?
- He needs a real woman. - And she's not?
- Stop it. - She's got everything.
- Except her teeth. - Then let's talk to the two old guys.
- What two old guys? - What two old guys? Your friends.
- The writer and the thingo. - Peti, leave those two idiots!
We just buried them and they came back, 'cause they're here, right?
- And how did they come back? Because there connected. - For sure.
That's why, if we talk to them, they can get us anything.
- Fine, I want a woman. - What for?
What do you mean what for? For me!
- Oh! - Oh!
Peti, go talk to the writer, we're coming too.
- Ok. Now? - Peti get going.
- All right. - Get.
Talk to the writer and he'll give you...
- I won't tell them a joke this time, ok? - Get going!
- Stop please! - Lajos, working hard?
Mr. Hernádi, I'd like to get married.
- You're not going with Marcsi Marok anymore? - Shut up.
- Write me a personals ad. - Me?
- Yes. - you're the Lord's lantern.
- We're here. - Fuck, we almost missed it.
What should I say?
- Health and happiness! - Hip-hip-hurray!
Let's have the first kiss.
Whoa! Whoa!
The goat climbed up the weeping willow...
To the highest...
Trouble boys?
- No, Peti wants to ask you something? - What?
- Ask him! - Are you mad?
- Stop farting around, and ask. - Shut up.
I'd like to know, why you did it?
She wasn't the one for me.
Józsi you should say a few words.
You wanted an ad, you got one.
You wanted a bride, right?
You got it. Not anymore.
No problem, but you should say thanks.
Nothing's good enough for you?
What do you care?
Peti, stop choking him, you'll get another boner.
- Stop, wait, let go. - What?
- Let go. - What now, you ass?
Hold this... Now.
- Well? - Well what?
- Go. - Go crazy.
The moments passed.
- You're done? - Done.
What should we do, Józsi? Just bury her?
- Watch the flies. - I don't have my tools here.
- Watch the flies, Peti. - Are you done?
She wasn't pretty.
And lldi? Is lldi pretty?
Give it, a sec.
Come on, Józsi. Give it.
Wouldn't it be better, if I kept it?
Just asking.
No thanks.
Józsi, don't eat it.
Not your business, ok?
He's right.
See, I told you.
What's up, Józsi?
You fell asleep.
No problem, lie down.
Want a bit?
Tell me, Péter, can my friend eat the apple?
The green apple... well, this bit.
Here.
- Let's have a beer, ok? - Yeah.
On the beach in the golden light, men and women are laying.
Big ships in the background, I'll be at the buffet line.
I'll be thinking about, how things just go round and round.
The moon rises on a silver platter, and the sun falls into a metal bucket.
Hey, Péter, do you know why Hungarians don't say cheers, when they drink beer?
- I heard about it, some history thing. - Yes?
Yes, to commemorate the thirteen martyrs from Arad.
- Do you know all their names? - Most of them.
Listen. Aulich, Damjanich, Dessewffy, Kiss, Knezich, Lahner, Lázár, Leiningen,
Nagy Sándor, Pöltenberg, Schweidel, Török, Vécsey.
A woman passing by, picks up the bucket, and gives
it to me, to take home with her, where we'll be waltzing naked.
Mr. Hernádi! Mr. Hernádi!
- Hello. - How are you?
- Mr. Hernádi! Hello. - Hello.
Mr. Hernádi, it's so good you're here, you'll never guess why we came.
- Shut up. - Ask already, Józsi.
- I can't... you ask. - Ask.
- Me? Shut up. - Fine, I'll ask, but you shut up.
- Fine. - Mr. Hernádi, I'd like to get married.
Write me a personals ad.
It's sweet.
And you're drinking that shit?
American.
- Yes, hello? - Kapa, where are you?
Stuck in traffic, sweetie, stuck in traffic. A hearse is blocking the road.
- Is it empty? - Yes, it's empty.
I know it. That's a bad sign.
What's the problem? Where are you?
- I'm in the Pólus mall, on the skating rink. - What the fuck are you doing at the mall?
Have you gone completely insane?
We're having guests over, and you've gone insane!
Get yourself home right now!
What? What are you all fucking looking at?
I'm talking to my wife!
Turn that shit off.
- Hello Ernő. - Hello Enikő, don't let it bother you, that my name is Józsi.
Get it the car, that's it.
- Thanks. - Józsi, we're free, want to come up for a threesome?
Home. Nach Hause. Casa.
Guests are coming, the woman's crying.
See Ernő, you need to avoid the cry babies.
Fucking new Russians, you think you can just snap your fingers,
- and the best ass comes running? - Yes.
One of these days, I'm going to kill you.
Fine Enikő. I'm glad we talked.
Now you can fuck off!
- Your wife's a prude. - And gay.
- Gay. - Don't fuck with my wife.
- Fine, sweetie. - 'Cause we're wrong and she likes to fuck?
- Buzz, buzz. - Bye Ernő.
- Bye-bye. - Bye Józsi.
- Are you still crying? - Just a little.
What's wrong?
- Pardon? - What the fuck is wrong?
Where are you? Pull over for a bit.
- Is it important? - Yes.
Ok.
- Kapa where are you? - I pulled over, like you asked, dear.
Stop crying, why are you crying?
Fine, cry! For fuck's sake!
Drown in your tears!
I'm at your favorite doctor's house, don't worry I'm bringing him to the party.
- The doctor turned back, now who you're going to fuck? - Get fucked, Kapa.
- Kapa do you have alcohol with you? - Do I ever not? Stop crying, stop it!
Then take a drink. I won't tell you until you drink.
- Drink. - Fine I'll drink.
- Great fucking time to be drinking, two cops are coming. - Drinking?
The wife made me. Good day.
Show me your papers.
Sir, do we know each other?
- No. - You remind me of someone.
Do I remind you of someone?
You remind me of yourself, sir.
- Did you attend the lower forest school? - No.
- Then the upper forest? - Yes.
- I remember, Pete. - What?
Peté, no Pepe. It's Kapa from the B.
- Pepe. - Hello Kapa.
- Hello. - It's great to see you.
- Hello. - It was worth it.
It's good to see you.
- We're having a party. - Really?
- Wanna come? - We're on the job.
- Right work comes first. - Right, on the job.
- Then drink to my health. - Thanks.
But there're two of us.
- Right sorry. - Kapa... Kapa.
Shut up for a second, I'm in the middle of something.
- Kapa. - And turn off that fucking music, 'cause it's driving me mad.
Kapa. Kapa. Did you drink? Drink, ok?
Kapa I'll tell you now, ok?
Kapa, it's your niece, she shot her family.
You brother, your sister...
What?
What the fuck?
You didn't understand? Your niece, shot your grandmother,
your grandfather, your sister-in-law, and your twin brother.
Alright. Drink.
Should we report it, staff sergeant?
Fuck no, what for?
Calm the fuck down.
- Stop fucking around! - Wait!
Stop fucking around!
Are you ok?
Yeah, but I think my brain just blew a fuse.
Let's go.
Stop, stop, stop!
- Peti, Peti, come here Peti. - I'm Peti?
Your remind me of yourself, staff sergeant.
- Upper forest school Peti. - Stop it.
You wanted to take my license, here take it.
Just give me back the 10,000 forint.
I'm not Peti, sir, and I've never seen you before.
And if I had 10,000 forint, which I don't, I wouldn't give it to you.
- Bye. - Who's this ass?
- Hello, Kapa. - Hello.
- Hey. - Hello.
Peti, wait. Peti, wait.
- Listen, have you ever been a cop? - What?
Have you ever been the Pope? Get your shit together.
Who the fuck is that guy behind us?
You don't recognize Dr. Zamelák? Stop farting around.
- Pull yourself together. - Hello dear, did you take something?
- Do you like my make-up? - You look very nice.
Sorry, uncle Kapa, I killed my family.
It happens... in today's world.
You read about things like this daily.
The gun goes off, must have been an accident.
- It was intentional, uncle Kapa. - Intentional?
Sure, sure, I'm the dumb one, it can only be intentional or 'cause you were drunk,
and you don't drink.
Oh, you. You wiped out your family.
- Zsolt will give you something. - Good, 'cause I could use some drugs.
- Where is Zsolt? - I think he's fucking your wife.
Oh, yeah. It's that time already?
- Welcome the guests. - What should I say?
- Something European. - Dear friends.
- Did they go home? - No, they're over there.
- Look they're waving. - Dear friends, kiss my ass.
- Ok? - Yeah fine, but say some more.
I'm glad you dragged your ugly asses here.
I mean, thank you for coming.
The interior minister couldn't make it, a bomb went off somewhere.
But you should have a good time, there's food and drink, the way grandpa likes it.
- What about your barbeque, Kapa? - Józsi, we have that too, the way I like it.
- Whistle to start the party. - Let the drinking begin.
You can throw up by the fence, but don't take a shit there.
- Ready? - Go.
- What's Dr. Zamelák whistling for? - Who's Zamelák, that's Pista Márton.
- Pista Márton? - Get your shit together, ok?
Fine, fine.
- Want one? - No way, I'm on a diet.
- Eat Peti, there eat that. - My hands are full.
- Enikő what the fuck are you doing here? - Fuck you, your wife invited me.
- And you? - Fuck you, me too.
- Shit song. - What is it some sort of new techno?
- Stop it? - What?
I've been fucking trying to figure out why you don't like the music.
Because you're a bunch of hicks.
- He's right. - I think it's new and ingenious.
The fact that lldi isn't fully undressed, is also new and ingenious.
That's the new fashion, back in America, even the flat women wear bras.
Anorexic sluts in underwear.
- My generation just... - you're not pronouncing...
- it right. - Whatever.
- Threw all their clothes of. - Csomi, you're not pronouncing it right.
And now the new middle aged, and this new conformity,
the fundamentalist bourgeois, this apocalyptic atmosphere.
Prayer and redemption and the righteous going straight to heaven.
Yeah, and the violence, the senseless violence everywhere.
You want a police state?
Fascism?
Hangings, punishment, the worlds rich funding the military police?
The poor, the hungry should just shut up?
You wouldn't even need judgment day.
Are you a communist?
Yeah, that's all we need.
Fucking hell! Come here.
Stop fucking around.
Ouch, fuck, you asshole!
Fucking hell, teacher, have you gone mad?
- You want some more? - Come on!
- Did you hurt your hand? - No.
Listen!
- Grandpa, I killed my whole family. - What?
They'll excicute you. They'll get together, vote on it, and have you hanged.
That's why we're here. Sit down I'll go through our options.
- I won't condone any sort of murder. - What murder?
She wiped out her family, let's not start a legal debate.
- This isn't... people please... you're not a wiz either. - I want no part in this.
Come sit, I'll go through our options.
One: Plastic surgery, different face, different person.
Two: Hiding out, leaving the country.
Three: We say someone else did it, for unknown reasons.
Blame it on a Turk, a Chinaman, an Albanian. Horibile dictu.
- Maybe a Taliban. So... - That's all well and good but we have to act quickly.
- Shut up, ok? - Do you speak any languages?
- She speaks Spanish pretty well. - Then she could go to South America.
Plastic surgery heaven. But you need to travel for that too.
Kapa is a planing wiz, he'll take care of it.
- How'd it happen? - Grandpa's gun was on the seat.
- Why? - She flunked, got the wrong question.
What wrong question?
Something about how the Dionysius cult compares to acting?
- And you didn't know the answer? - Why do you know it, uncle Kapa?
Me, why the fuck should I know it?
My job is to make money, not knowing your school curriculum.
- Where's my bag. - I make money, to send you to school, so you won't be a hick!
- Kapa. - So you'll know how to eat with a knife and fork.
So you won't belch! So you won't fart!
So you'll learn languages!
Or I'll beat your head in!
Hey, this asshole called the police.
They're coming on their own.
What the fuck for, Józsi?
They're coming for me.
Deny, deny, understand? Ask for a lawyer, and don't say a word. I'll be there soon.
Ok? Kapa's going to come and get you out, so relax.
They'll test your hand for gun powder residue.
I'm not stupid, I had gloves on.
Ok, deny, deny, deny.
Are you sick?
Drink something.
- More guests. - Good afternoon.
- I'm the staff sergeant, are you Mr. Mucsi? - Józsi, call me Józsi.
But my real name is Zoli, but the mates call me Kapa.
I have an arrest warrant with your name on it.
I don't understand, but I won't resist arrest.
I object in my client's name, I'm his lawyer.
- Don't object. - I'll take care of it.
- But I object. - Don't object, listen.
- You've been a cannibal, at these partys for the past four weeks too. - What?
- Cannibalism? - Kapa.
- I quit, you hear me? - What?
- You quit? - You're a real piece of shit, get fucked.
- You're betraying me? You scumbag. - Stop it.
Betrayal? Scum.
If you want I'll give you a blow job.
The way of the world.
And the day started off so boring.
THE GIRL FROM TATABÁNYA
Here we go.
Here comes that, bird brain again.
I bet he's got the suicide note with him too.
"I'm trough Gizi. I can't take it anymore, I've tried."
"It's over and done with."
If he came twice, he'll come three times too.
- Right? - I'm through Gizi.
I can't take it anymore, I've tried.
That's it.
That's all.
Drop dead!
I wouldn't even care.
- You can kiss my ass too, understand? - When you're cold and dead.
Right.
Come on, what are you standing there for? Keep moving,
Don't come up here, understand?
What the fuck are you doing here, Peti?
Well?
What are you doing up there, come down!
- Wait, I'll come up. - Don't, for fuck's sake!
Listen, come down from here, Peti.
You're bothering everyone, you'll scare away the tourists.
You're ruining the view.
I'm not bothering you, so go back down.
- Ok, ok. - This will only take a second.
Kapa. Stop there, you can watch if you want.
- I don't mind, really. - Calm down Peti.
- Go back down and watch. - Listen, don't sit down or you'll get an infection.
Calm down. Why are you doing this, tell me why?
Why the fuck are you doing this?
Right, of course, don't answer.
I talked to Gizi anyway, Peti.
- Now? - I know your suicide note off by heart.
It's really nice, you did a good job, I know you.
Listen, think about it for a second, you're going to jump,
'cause of a skunk with hairy legs and bad breath?
Don't touch me, are you insane?
You're insane, you bought her a car, a house. Not even a house...
you bought her a mansion. You ass!
- What's that got to do with anything? - Think about it.
- Careful, I'll fall, you idiot - Think about it for a little bit.
- Fine. - Fine.
- You're not mad? - Not mad.
- Ok, bye then, I'll check up on you, you're fine. - I'm fine.
I'll be going then. If it's not a problem that I fucked Gizi first.
Don't even mention her name, you know I hate that.
Fine air yourself out a little up here, Peti, bye.
Oh, but I have an idea, if you jump,
Make sure you jump far enough, or you'll splatter on the curb.
You'd look like a big ball of goop.
What would your mother, Erzsi say?
Don't mention my mother.
- Bye Peti. - Kapa! Kapa!
Hey, come over here, jump from here, you won't hit the asphalt from here.
Wait, Kapa. Gizi's not the problem.
See, you're not that dumb after all.
- Listen... - What's the problem?
I'm finished, I'm through, a wreck.
- Done. - So what's the problem?
I'm poor, a nothing, see? Azero, a fucking zero divided by zero.
I used to count for something.
- You used to, yes. - I did count for something, remember.
They poisoned my dog, set my garage alight while I was in it.
- They paid attention to me. - Oh, so you came up for a little nostalgia?
- What's the problem? - Nobody cares about me anymore.
- I'm sinking into the gutter. - What's the problem?
I'm poor, I'm a bum!
Poor doesn't do it justice, I'm an orphan!
I'm blind and deaf.
I'm poor! I'm a black!
I'm a Jew! I'm a Gypsy!
- See? - Want some lithium?
- Lithium? - Come here, let me give you a kiss.
Oh, you crazy kid!
Unbelievable.
- That's it? - Yes.
Everything's ok then. Listen, do TV interviews, write a book.
About the dog or the garage.
You'll be famous again, and knowing how stupid Gizi is, she'll be happy too.
- You know what trouble is? Do you know who's troubled? - Who?
- What? - Me buddy.
- Why? - Why? Because I made it!
Understand?
I'm a billionaire!
- But... - Billions!
5 billion here, 10 there.
And you're messing about here?
Police foundation?
10 million just like that, do you know how many people I take care of?
- How many? - Media boat!
Buddy, I have to be seen everywhere.
- Are you fucking with me? I can't do a show like this on the bridge. - Listen.
- I could jump too! - Don't do it, are you insane!
- But I can't! - Stop fucking around, Kapa!
Don't get upset.
Fuck I'm talking about millions of forint, and you're on about some dog?
You're poor?
For fuck's sake.
- Oh, come on. - Leave me alone, I swear!
Don't touch me!
Wipe your mouth, you're drooling all over the place, fuck.
I swear you're pissing me off, you make me climb up here, with my bad legs.
I'm afraid of heights, shitting my pants, and you're just messing about?
- Alright fine. - Leave me alone.
Let's get a beer.
Since when do you fucking drink beer?
I've got a taste for the Ászok brand, why?
- Doesn't it give you gas? - A little, but why?
- I'm shocked, you drinking beer. - The 10.5% alcohol Ászok brand, you know?
- That lasts for 60 days. - Alright, listen.
- You don't like it? - Hate it, now listen.
Kill yourself. Fine, do yourself in.
Someone else is doing a show at another bridge too.
But I can't allow you to die so disgracefully.
What would people say? I'd go on my media boat, and they'd go on about,
- how my friend's brains splattered out. - Let's have a beer.
- Let's get the hell out of here. - Come down, I know a great place.
It's so calm there, you can quietly kill yourself.
Let's go.
- Did I tell you I'm going to buy the Buda Castle? - Really?
- Now? - Yeah.
- But they have some sort of display there? - Well I'll just chuck it out,
I'll have the walls torn out, put in a big kitchen, a pool, everything.
- Sounds nice. - I'll make it that.
- Let's have an Ászok beer. - Alright.
Careful fuck, let's not fall in now!
What are you fucking on about?
Careful 'cause there's no handrail on the left side from here on.
- I've been here a bunch of times already. - I know, I came with you.
- Kapa? - Yes?
- Is that boat yours too? - Everything is mine.
They won't let me buy the parliament house, though.
Well that's big, anyway. That would be too big, no?
Well...
The upkeep would be a lot, you know?
Fucking wind. I'm freezing my ass off.
That won't be bothering you for long, though.
Come on Peti, don't get upset.
Listen, we'll get drunk, then you can jump.
Believe me, the bridge would have been disgusting.
Look the scenery is so much nicer here, it's quiet and calm.
Your head would have split open, if you would have jumped in the Danube.
The professionals say it's like landing on concrete.
Is the well here somewhere?
And if your head doesn't split open, the water police would come.
They'd pull you out, but you'd be fucked 'cause your clothes would be wet,
and you don't have anything with you, 'cause you left it all with Gizi, right?
They'd fine you, 'cause for sure they take some money.
From me? I don't have anything.
Well then you'd go to jail.
The bottomless well is around here somewhere...
- right? - Someone must know, relax.
- Sir? - Yes.
Would you like some beer?
- I never drink after anyone. - Sir, that's not a problem.
You pulled that out of thin air?
- Are you a magician? - Sir, the air is full of riches.
- See here's a rabbit, it's yours. - I'll give it to my wife.
- And this. - It'll be good for the kid.
Hey, that's my rabbit. Don't give it to him.
Peti it would just get wet with you, his kid would like it.
- Don't begrudge me the rabbit. - Rubber dog, rubber rabbit...
long live Mr. Frigyes Rothschild.
See you liked that too.
So who wants to commit suicide?
You're very smart. Do you want to be an MP?
A minister, sir, that's a profession where you have to know what you're doing.
So who?
- My sister. - Your sister?
Ok let's go.
2000 forint.
- I'll pay you there. - Ok.
Cheers.
- No thank you, I don't feel like it. - He's jumping sober.
- To us. - Chin, chin.
This is it.
- This is great, sir. - What do you think?
Ingenious, Peti come on, Peti.
Did you get lobotomized, come and take a look.
Well?
- This is it? - Of course.
Go closer.
What do you think?
- Not bad. - So, 2000 forint.
Right, sure, 2000.
Minus two rabbits and the beer, that's 1350. Forget the 350.
Here's 1000 forint and we're square.
I've defiantly seen you somewhere. Come on, come on, let's do this.
- We're coming. - Come on, come on.
If my boss sees me, I'll get sent to jail.
Grab that. Hey, don't take it away.
- Hold this. - Where's this from?
I bought it at the flea market.
- Grab it - Bring it here.
- This is heavy. - Life is heavy Peti.
- Hey, hey, hey! - Don't chuck it.
- Ok... - Let's not loose our heads.
Ok, watch your hand.
- All that money under the table? - Don't fall in. - No.
- No taxes? - None.
- Do you keep a tally? - Of what?
Men, women, age range, occupation, schooling.
- Gypsy, Jew. - Stop talking crap, you're unbelievable.
I'm trying to decide whether I'll go to heaven or hell.
For sure hell, right? You need a tux to get into heaven.
Poor fools like me go to hell.
And you're talking about crap?
- Are you done? - He's a chatterbox.
- What? - Are you done?
- No. - So this is how it's gonna go... I'm sure I've seen you before.
On the TV? What? I'm listening.
- Some economics shit? - Hmm.
You stole right?
Ashot of Hubertus?
- Come on. - Come on Peti, come, come.
This is how it's gonna go down, you climb in and hold my hands,
when you say "now", then I'll drop you in, ok?
- Ok... - you got it right?
Sure. It looks deep. Does it happen often, that someone doesn't say a word?
Because maybe I won't be able to say "now".
- Doesn't matter. - Not a problem.
Then I take over. Don't forget, I need to know psychology for this profession.
Sorry, to interrupt sir,
but you could be the president of the Academy of Sciences.
- Fine. - I was serious.
On TV, that's where I saw you. Did you get it? Hold my hands, I let go.
- 2000 forint. - I got no more money Peti, you're up.
- I don't have any either. - A ring or watch?
- Well I have a watch. - You won't need it anymore, Peti.
Oh my God, it's almost 2:30.
- No it's already 2:30. - Come on.
- Come on, go on. - Ready?
Do like the gentleman said, Peti.
- No, no, no, no. - Grab my hands.
- I've got you, step over there. - Ok.
Step there... go on, I've got you.
Don't let go.
Tell me when.
What?
- I won't hurt myself will I? I'm hanging in the right place? - Get out of there.
- Get out. - I don't want this.
- Come on. - Ok.
- Fuck, ok I'm out. - Come on.
- Ok, it's just...
Stop pushing me!
Sorry. Don't go insane this shits about to cave in under us.
- Don't worry about that, what's your problem? - What do you mean?
- You're a chicken, right? - No.
You're fucking scared!
Why are you fucking around? I'm talking to you.
I bring you here, and the gentleman gets you a perfect spot.
And you're quaking in your boots?
Your teeth are chattering! Shut up!
For fuck's sake, Peti.
You have to look death straight in the eye.
Bravely, like a hero. Like a soldier.
Yeah ok, but jarheads got rum before a battle.
In the middle ages. Anyway Whiskey is better.
God speed gentleman.
Fuck. For fuck's sake.
Well he's finished.
The well is connected to the Danube.
The Turks dug it out, what 200 years ago...
Poor Kapa. What was wrong? He had everything, understand?
Money, millions, girls, cars.
- The Bahamas. - Alright, but don't pity him.
He's better off, the rich go to heaven.
Stupid Kapa. He didn't put a tux on.
Poor fool.
- He was a grade above me at the upper forest school. - Who inherits his fortune?
Stupid ass.
Hello boss, this is my friend.
We went to the upper forest school together.
- Really, Józsi? - But.
Good bye.
The girls are waiting for me.
- Too chicken to jump? - Right.
But there was another one.
This one won't last long either.
Real tears after two dickheads like them?
It's glycerin.
Strong shit.
I was born at the edge of the forest, on the young eighth avenue, such a long time ago.
I remember the streets and the I remember the houses, such a long time ago.
I remember the Csill family and the coloured dust, such a long time ago.
It's not a secret, I'm a miner's daughter. My heart draws me there to this day.
I got everything from life. And that has made me happy.
But I'll always remain, the girl from Tatabánya.
Life may take it all. Que sera sera.
Because what I was is what I will be. The girl from Tatabánya.
- Thanks for the drink Karcsi. - My name is Józsi.
I know that the Hungarians, don't say cheers with beer.
- Ok. - I know, it's because of the 13 martyrs from Arad.
- Right. - Chin, chin.
- Karcsi. - Józsi.
You remind me of someone. Bem?
- They usually say I look like a worker's leader. - Béla Kun?
- Marx. - There was a guy working here who had the same name.
He's gone now. When I came here, he had already left.
So I never knew him. You know Karcsi?
I've seen better days, as they say.
- I had my own company. - And?
And, well. Capitalists, globalisation.
- And now I'm clean floors. - Pepe.
Coming.
- What did you say, capitalism? - Yeah.
I'll check what he wrote about it.
You do that, Karcsi, and tell me what is says. Something rotten for sure.
- Take care. - Bye.
- Fuck. Oops. - Good morning.
Good morning gentlemen.
What, you don't say hello to your boss?
Péter, sorry to disturb you, while you're working.
But if I remember correctly, you used to say hello to me first.
Until now Kapa, but this morning you got kicked in the ass, you're not my boss.
So I can tell you to beat it.
Not like when you were somebody, I couldn't back then.
Even though we went to the same school.
So now, fuck you.
All I ask is that you don't walk on the freshly washed floors.
Fine, but can I ask you something?
- Sure. - Was this your idea Peti?
- This morning greeting. - Unfortunately, no.
No it was the Human Relations Director's idea,
we do it to every fired boss.
- I'm glad. - It's a fantastic, ingenious idea.
- I think so too, I liked it. - Bye.
- Take care, sorry my hands are dirty. - I'm knee deep in shit, but not for long.
Why?
You're kidding...
No way Kapa, you're a genius.
Listen, wait a sec, come back.
Listen, I had an idea.
I'll go up, you stay here,
come up in 5 minutes, I'll set out the scene for you.
You'll march in like King Mathias into Gömör, ok?
- You'll give me a job right? - Sure.
- I'll be like one of Kádár's men. - Sure you will, Peti.
- Árpi, bring them here. - Peek a boo. Hello.
Ladies and gentleman, Hello Misó.
I'm only the messenger angel,
the saviour's coming soon.
But I bring the good news,
Béla Méla is alive, the Buda castle still stands and long live the Hungarians, Józsi.
What in God's name!
Come on eat the scones, don't mess around.
There you go. Hello Misó.
- Hello. - You guys are great.
- Sir, excuse me. - Yes, you're excused.
- Sir, how long have you been working for us? - That depends on where you work.
- Yelling has never been fashionable at our company. - Oh.
- Not fashionable. - The new leader, even determined the decibel level,
- machines detect it. - My sweet little cunts, you're the greatest.
And this little part, it's marvelous, listen here,
my message to the Chancellor, the leader, you know, who's in there,
is that Pepe says: I'll put my arms in my suspenders,
pull them down, wiggle around a little, see?
And he can come and kiss my ass!
Come on eat these.
We asked you nicely to control yourself.
Yes, you did.
Baron Anger...
...gets terrible headaches. - Shhhhh.
Control yourself, sonny.
The Baron gets headaches.
- Who are you anyway? - Me? I'm the leader's assistant.
You messed up the grammar. The fucking grammar got to you too?
Make it past tense. I said make it past tense.
- I was. - Great,
and now put the leader in past tense too.
- I can't. - Do it.
Or I'll rip your dick off, stick it in your mouth,
and you'll find out how fantastic it is,
to suck your own dick.
- You hear me? - I can't.
You can't? Yes you can.
Józsi, hello, what you don't even say hello? We're learning our grammar.
Peti take the trash out.
Sure. Would you like an apple?
Hello my dear.
Jószi we talked about this and the time is now. Peti calm yourself.
This whole dump is mine, since 11 in the morning.
The sackers became the sackees.
We're not going anywhere.
Don't ask me how it happened.
Maybe I robbed a bank or I got the Ukrainian mafia's money, right?
Or maybe I fucked one of Rockefeller's daughters. - You're great.
"Pecunia non olet" Money does not smell.
My dear... she has three diplomas.
Vespasian said that, when he set up public toilets that you had to pay for in Rome.
We've been paying for shit ever since.
Ladies and Gentlemen.
I bring a message from the leader.
Don't hold yourselves back, keep celebrating.
Everyone will get a large severance package, and we may need to employ you by contract.
I respectfully ask you all to go to the main foyer.
The administration is waiting for you there.
What are you Zsolti?
The human relations director.
Human relations, that's fantastic, and since when?
9 this morning.
- Have you lost your mind? - Shut up.
- Shut up, or I'll break you in two. - Fuck you, you maniac.
- Fuck! - Shut up!
Stay there.
- Sir. - The Baron doesn't speak Hungarian.
I'll translate for you.
Oops, you messed up Baron. Let's blame it on the headaches.
By the way I'm your sales manager,
or at least I used to be.
There's no point to this, without bullets.
The dream analysis books don't hold much promise for you.
Zsolti, my son, get up.
Get my jacket, and then get out.
Faster. Don't throw it, place it on the armrest. Hurry up, Zolti.
I don't have all day!
See the problem is Baron, that you surrounded yourself with dickheads.
By the way Baron, my leader...
or at least you were until 11 this morning. I quit.
I took over the company.
I think he doesn't understand.
Well?
The Baron, asks you to leave.
Please allow that I not use the words he did,
as Anger used very strong phrases.
Translated they would be very rude.
Allow it? Allow it? Fine I'll allow it.
Fuck you Anger. Don't mess with me.
Fuck you, understand?
People in the Eastern block are a strange bunch.
Strange, strange... All nations are strange.
- Did you know they eat with chop-sticks? - Every idiot knows that.
They hold it something like this, I don't know.
Like this and they use this one to grab the food and then...
I'm glad we discussed it.
- They flap the fan like this. - Stop it.
Stop flapping the fan.
Just walk the straight and narrow, while working for me.
By the way I was at the...
...fuck.
The great wall...
They've never seen a real white person before.
Just in the movies.
They followed us around, yelling, "Sunjali! Sunjali!"
And flapping their fans.
- Oh... - So, don't flap the fan.
Listen, Anger, don't reach for the gun.
Don't because you can't.
You can't lift your hand.
See?
Your hand stays here.
Zsolti, toss yourself in that fucking elegant armchair,
like I was before, ok? Thank you.
So, Anger, you loaded it?
You're not so stupid after all.
He loaded it.
Zsolti, sit down!
Properly! That's not how I was sitting.
Pupils dilated, left nostril open...
...drop your right hand a bit, hip turned, that's it.
Look at him, isn't he cute?
You can turn your head.
You're both so cute.
Lookie, what did you find Józsi?
- Kapa, you won't believe what happened. - What happened?
We were standing in the hall and he just started shooting.
I dropped to the ground, by my sweetheart,
- and this snot bag, this... - The assistant.
Yes. Started talking about,
mass hysterical suicide, or something.
Zsolti, mass hysterical suicide?
Your having a shit day.
This fucking piece of shit, this snot bag, shot me,
now I don't know if I'm a spirit or I've raised from the dead,
but maybe I'm just immortal.
Now you can talk.
You're gonna die, Kapa!
Everyone dies, little Anger. Only three people went to heaven alive.
Jesus Christ, though it was easy for him, he's God's son.
His mother and the prophet Elias.
You know, Anger, the chariot of fire.
Maybe that's how you'll go.
You'll get in your Benz,
small flash, dull bang.
The Lord takes the ones he loves,
or the ones he smites.
You can't do this to me, Kapa.
Or I'll let you rot in the office.
You know, you won't be able to move your arms and if I want, your tongue either.
You won't be able to scream, you'll shit in your pants.
- And you'll stink like cholera. - You can't do this to me, Kapa!
Little Anger, after you shot me in the head, I can do anything.
You know, I'm the Lord's lantern.
You're gonna die, Kapa!
You already said that. Talk about the company instead.
No? Then fine.
- How would you like to die? - I wouldn't.
Fine then you'll commit suicide.
Get a few bottles of vodka.
This skunk's office is full of them.
- I want to die sober. - Fine, then you'll die drunk.
Last wish?
One.
I want to say good bye to the girls.
Did you fuck them?
Girls, the director would like to say good bye.
My personal, economical, and societal situation,
forced me to toss my life away.
Remember me.
Baron.
- This is the third one. - Three's a lucky number in Hungary.
Say Kapa... don't tell the girls, that I wasn't a Baron, ok?
Fine, but then you shouldn't tell St. Peter that I was there today,
they didn't let me in, doesn't matter, they won't let you in either.
But if you come back, I'll shoot you in the head.
They're over! They're over!
The sweet times are... You won't get the women anymore.
Shot to the chest.
Shot to the chest, this one too. Nice work.
Where there's a chest, there's a shot.
- Poor Pepe. - Poor thing.
He was even born under a lucky sign.
Kapa, Kapa look! You're a god!
- Look. - yeah, I see, I'm the Lord's lantern.
Now I know.
- It's a film, Peti. - What?
- I said it's a film. - What is?
Celluloid tape, light sensitive material.
- Light, light, yes I see that. It's so good. - Yes.
- What's that on your head? - Nothing.
- What? - Nothing.
Kapa and what happens to us in this film?
- What do you mean? - Will you kill us?
Zsolt don't be silly! People like your are irreplaceable.
Politics, economics love people like you.
Take my hand, I don't bite.
- It's lucky, that my glasses survived before. - Yes, very lucky.
- You're hiring this capitalist as well? - Peti, it's not your concern.
Fine. What about everyone else?
They'll be dealt with on Judgment day.
That's not fair, that's a long time from now.
- Peti, you don't understand the ways of the world. - I know and that's so good.
- What's with these clothes? - These?
- Yeah. - I got it upstairs.
These were our clothes at the undertakers, don't you remember?
What cemetery? Hey, what cemetery?
- The undertakers. - Get changed, this second.
And chuck these out.
Go change! Move it!
Bravo boss! Bravo!
Long live the boss!
Thank you you're all fantastic.
Pretend that I killed everyone... I mean kissed.
Who brought this?
I did, boss.
Sweet champagne, you ass?
Will you smoke this? Thanks, your good.
- Thanks. - Boss...
Hold on a bit. If you'll allow it.
- Hello ladies. - you're not mad, right boss?
I stole your lover.
- No problem, we'll have threesomes. - Never, never, never.
That Soroksár-ian accent doesn't do it for me anymore.
It make the company seem more powerful. High positioned people and no one has an accent?
It's good for you, Kapa and for the company.
And incase you missed it I already used this Soroksár-ian accent.
I've met you before, haven't I?
- What about me? - Your time is up.
Get lost.
Boss, this way.
- Excuse me? - If you please, Sir.
- That's better. - Bye.
The music is for you.
Villa Negra!
Bravo!
Bravo. Congratulations. Congratulations.
I've never seen anything like it, I swear.
I swear I've never seen such shit in my life. Get fucked all of you!
I wasn't clear enough? Get fucked!
- Whose idea was this? - Mine.
- This shit?
I'll remember this, Zsolti!
Come here, dear.
Hey Kapa, you didn't even like the music?
- Come here Gyuri! - Don't let it bother you that I'm with a woman.
Sorry. This guy... he didn't write it, he just mixed the song.
I think it was good.
You did this Gyurcsi? Come here.
There.
Go busk... Bye-bye.
- What are you doing in this fire fighter's uniform? - It's a gravedigger's uniform.
Oh, gravedigger's. Go away.
Sorry. Didn't I tell you that at my company everyone has to be tip-top?
- Yes. - you'll take this shit off, dump it in the trash. Am I clear?
I can button it too, see?
Say Kapa, I was thinking...
maybe I'll only work part time at the company, cause...
- Watch your step. - Thanks.
That will cover my expenses, my Medicare, pension, everything...
I'll say it again, but a little slower...
- Ok. - Change... throw this crap in the garbage.
- Got it? - Sure, sure.
- Kapa, what's that on your neck? - A birth mark.
- Stop joking around, that there. - Oh that?
- That's my copyright symbol. - Like the proletarian afterlife's symbol?
You always were a poet.
- Sit! - Ok, here I'll sit.
- Behind the panel. Change and shut up. - Ok.
Gyula, you can pat him down a little while he's changing, ok?
Don't come over there, those are just my friends.
My friends! Give me a gun.
My friends!
Zsolti, what the fuck was this place before we came, a morgue?
It was a bargain, boss. There was more money, here than what we paid for it.
It's good. It's yours.
Well if you're trying to kill me, then yes.
You Kapa? You're immortal!
Oh, you're so sweet.
But if someone lights another sparkler, fuck, I'll shove it up their ass.
Sorry boss.
This isn't your day.
Run out of ideas already? You little fuck.
I'm touched.
Almost to tears, but I sense you're trying to fuck me over.
Really?
Mafia cake?
It opens...
- out comes a gunman? - What a dwarf or a mini robot?
I think you watch too many American films, Kapa.
Some like it hot.
- And some like it gay, right? - No one's perfect.
But I'm not freaked out, give me a knife.
There you go boss. Sorry, this really isn't my day.
The Villa Negra is not a convent. The Villa Negra's not a shiny parochial.
If a cool cat knocks on the door here, he'll find sanctuary in this quiet house.
Villa Negra!
THE SKYIS CLOSING. - Hurry up, the sky is closing.
Whose is this aspen orchard, you can't hear the noises from outside...
I'm going to make a Bourgeois Eden out of this whole place, you'll see.
It'll please the heart and soul.
Come on...
Does your back hurt?. My knee does.
This entire ally here... The whole thing.
I'll figure out how.
- What do you think? - Alright, kitty-cat.
- You just need some whiskers here. - A beard?
It would look good? But just a small one, you know?
That would be a turn on? I'd go...
Pay attention, 'cause I won't show you twice.
Will we have a fast lane, director?
Józsi you should come closer, you're doing the next one.
- Director, sir, this is crap! - Józsi!
- The whole thing bores me! - Józsi.
- He's right. - Go fuck yourselves!
Józsi, if you leave, you'll be sorry, this is a calling! - I don't give a fuck!
- It's humanitarian work. - It's "humanic", boss.
That's not the problem, boss, I think all of mankind is the problem.
Peti... that was... that was beautiful.
I know.
- This is an ugly job, no? - No Peti, it's not, it's very useful.
Though if I was a powerful man,
I'd make it law that everyone has to be cremated.
Then we'd run into problems at the resurrection.
- Body parts all over the place? - You're a real fuckhead!
Get that disgusting shit off your shoulders.
- Someone's whistling! - Your ears are ringing.
They're knocking, knocking. Who's knocking?
Awoodpecker.
Where are you off to?
You can't run from your fate.
Say Kapa, has anyone said to your face that you're an intellectual?
- Right to your face? - I see.
I won't miss next time, director!
Kapa, you can go borrow a pay check from the library, you're fired!
Fuck you!
- Hello. - Hello, are you with them?
- Of course. - Greetings Mr. Hernádi.
- Are you going up? - This afternoon.
I have to go too, I'm having trouble taking off...
- I had that problem. - See when I try to fly.
One color on us, yellow. And yellow is yellow.
German countrymen, wash the stain. And grab the German colt.
Hell is here on earth. They're against the sky, poisoning ourwells.
Grab him, don't let him go. Grab his stunted skin and tear it off.
March with us, shoulder to shoulder.
Come with me countryman, I'll take you to Lohengrin and Parsiphal.
Say Mr. Serer, why are you running around? Running around like a headless chicken?
Running around like a mindless idiot?
What the fuck do you have on your shoulders?
Director, sir. I've fucking had it with mankind.
Something's wrong with my wings, never mind...
People say we need angels,
ones that don't just kill, but also love.
Or only love, I don't know?
I don't know, I'm a little confused...
That's fantastic.
I'm confused... but that's fantastic.
There is reason in his madness.
Dear God... Quoting Shakespeare wrong...
your a real hick director.
He put the wings on. I brought him a pair too.
Don't get excited, it doesn't mean anything.
Even as a young child, I was a fucking menace.
I kicked my grandfather in the teeth, when I was 7 months old.
And what do you think happened, director?
He swallowed his false teeth and choked.
The evil ones have it the best, there's always something to forgive them for.
Director, sir. My soul is so happy today.
I just saw Mr. Jancsó and Mr. Hernádi before,
and John the Baptist was with them, or was it Jesus Christ,
or maybe the Apostle Paul, I don't know, they were on a horse and cart.
Say, are any of the screws loose in your head?
Wait I haven't finished, because Lajos Kossuth...
was reading a poem from some German guy...
Heidegger, or Hidler, or Heider?
- What's his first name? - Well, Lajos.
- Lajos Kossuth. - Idiot, the poets' first name.
Adolf, Arnulf... Armold?
Say, Mr. Serer, you've never heard the name Adolf Hitler?
No, sir.
You don't know that there hasn't been a horse and cart in the cemetery for 20 years now?
Drink to my health, ok?
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Fuck!
- What? - Something.
I had something in mine, too. What's wrong?
Wait I'll push it up. Better?
No? It's not? Wait.
There look, I can see its head.
Take your hand out of your mouth, see there's his head.
Wait I'll flush it out.
- It's coming out. - Fuck me.
- There see? - Fucking hell.
- You had a frog in your throat? - What frog, fuck you, what frog?
Well...
Listen, did you know that the director, has a stick on beard?
What director, there hasn't been a director, here for 20 fucking years!
- Oh. - Yeah.
Any more questions?
- Yes. - You do?
- Who the fuck is that? - Hello Kapa.
- Do you know this little shit? - Hello guys, hello Kapa.
- Do you know him? - What do you mean, "do you know him", you should be ashamed.
- Turn around, sir. - Kapa.
What on his shoulders? Transcendental dreams? Come back down to earth, sir.
Sorry I didn't hear you before, what did you say?
You should be ashamed.
- Kapa? - Who are you?
Stop it!
- Kapa? - Who's Kapa?
Kapa, your Kapa and I'm Peti, Péter.
- Oh, St. Peter. - Get fucked Kapa! We were friends.
We went to the upper forest school together.
There are times, when a person doesn't recognize anybody.
- Not even his friends. - Do you recognize me now?
Bring him here!
Friends, enemies. These terms are cloudy these days, sir.
Understand?
No one has ever hit me before...
they never will again.
Let him go!
I just want my bike.
My bike.
- I'll leave it here... - We'll take it for a spin.
I'm not a shadow, on the gray wall.
Down in the dark... on the dark knoll.
Standing, notwith my back to you,
waiting for some money to slide my way from you.
Don't mess with me, cause I'll beat your fucking head in.
Whose fucking street and whose hood are we fucking in?
Cause you're not my brother, and you're not my fucking relative!
No one here is scratching at their balls,
But soon yourwoman will be bouncing on my balls,
And I'll let you watch, while she sucks me off!
I've never had such a great ho, but from tomorrow she'll bejust another blow.
I'll beat your mother, cause your times up.
So never place a bet, on the black horse!
I'm not a shadow, on the fucking wall,
and this isn't even the last street on the fucking table.
You're the victim, the one who ran off,
but I'm the killer, so you're not the one I'm betting on.
The fucking bitches, will drive you insane,
and you'll go straight to the nuthouse, with the rest of the insane.
I hope you know, that I'm the black horse,
all that counts is the money, and the white snort
Learn fast that round here, I am the law,
otherwise you'll be dragged down by the whirlpool.
You'll lose your money, your car and your ho,
and no one will give a shit, that you've gotten so low.
This isn't Park Avenue, this isn't for you,
betting on the black horse, you'll lose all of you.
Dude, yourwoman's old, but she could beat you down,
Fuck off now, cause we'll beat you down!
I told you to listen to what I'm all about,
never place a bet on the black horse, that's what it's all about.
You must be right, I mixed you up with somebody. I thought...
...we know each other, but I was wrong.
I apologize.
What about Kierkegaard?
I asked you something.
Having trouble taking off?
We'll help you.
Let him fly.
Someone please tell me, am I crazy, or is the world crazy?
If I ever got on the high horse, would I give a shit about the little people?
Of course not! Fuck them!
But I'm just a fuckhead.
And the horse is too high for me anyway, I couldn't reach up!
Even if I could somehow, there wouldn't be a saddle on it.
Am I wise? Put me in the Bible.
Write me in the place of Solomon, ok?
Pepe in the Bible. Pepe in the Bible.
Either I'm crazy, or the world's crazy.
I'm crazy or the world's crazy.
The didn't seriously think they could kill me?
I'm immortal.
I'm leaving Gyula, do you mind?
- Are you coming? - No.
If you're leaving give me that, I'll give you something too.
Say, Péter, are you coming with me?
For a little bit, ok, Mr. Director.
You know I'm like the little mole, that asked his mother...
- you know this one? - I know it.
Then I won't tell it.
I'll leave the wings here for you Mr. Hernádi.
I'm just smoking my pipe.
Take care.
We are still alive, we're saying something,
butwhy do we talk? The one who stops,
on wet and sandy, plateau knows that,
he must continue, no need to look.
That balcony is, not on this beach,
with a sad woman, maybe who could,
love some one with, a mustache like mine, how's not a bit,
Mediterranean.
Hurry up, the sky is closing.
Maybe in a winter, southern ocean,
there's a wet metal banister, and lukewarm rainfall.
Leave it for tomorrow, leave the boat here,
I'm sleeping in the bottom, and she's lying there too.
Lying on some bed, somewhere in Hungary.
Balatonszárszó is the place it's close to.
Everyone is sleeping, who is angry,
that's the only thing, that there's some power in.
Hurry up, the sky is closing.
Hurry up the sky is closing.
Hurry up, the sky is closing.
The way itwas, was,
We tried to live through it,
you tired to see if, you could do it.
The way itwas, was always someone else dies,
others go crazy, and we never do.
I have one more show, that I will show,
if lot's of people, want to see it.
Here is a picture, go ahead and look,
whales on the shore, but I wonderwhy?
Hurry up the sky is closing.
Kapa, Józsi, Pepe, Miki, Gyula.
And...
- Behind me Zoltán Mucsi. - Behind me Péter Scherer.
And I'm József Szarvas.
In front of me is our favorite poet, Miklós Hernádi.
In front of me is Gyula Jancsó. I mean Miklós!
- Gyula, you idiot! - Gyula.
The Villa Negra is not a convent. The Villa Negra's not a shiny parochial.
If a humble man knocks on the door here, he'll find sanctuary in this quiet house.
Again... Villa Negra is not a convent. The Villa Negra's not a shiny parochial.
If a poor man knocks on the door here, he'll find sanctuary in this quiet house.
Along came a rich man, in an expensive car.
He tried to buy the house, he offered us money.
We kept his money, he wondered what he'd get in exchange.
His doctor treated him for three weeks.
Distributed by: Navigator Film Ltd. And Leon Film Ltd.